And they say Hollywood is out of ideas

 

51jax3dbfzl“I wanna remake ‘High Noon.’ ”
“What’s that?”
Old western. Early Social Justice piece.”
“Westerns are dead.”
“No, it’s gonna be an update.”
“Like what.”
“What’s hot right now?”
Narcos is killing it on Netflix.”
“Okay, so, it’s High Noon at the Cartels.”
“Hero?”
“Was played by Gary Cooper.”
“Old white dude, right? Pass.”
“No, we’ll get Denzel to play him. He’s an Iraq vet with PTSD.”
“Okay, that’s original. Love interest?”
“Pacifist Quaker Wife.”
“White Chick? Pass.”
“No, we’ll get Lupita Nyong’o.”
“She’s a saint of color, right?”
“Yeah––”
“Not edgy enough.  Needs to be interracial.”
“Reese Witherspoon. They’re married, see––”
“Heterosexual married couple? Are you trying to get me fired? Pass.”
“Okay, she’s a lesbian activist on the run from the riots in Seattle. FBI is looking for her in all the dyke dives. Denzel marries her to help her hide out.”
“Denzel’s the beard? I like it.  What the conflict?”
“There’s this Marshall, see, and the bad guys he put away are getting out of prison and coming to town looking for payback. On the train that arrives at High Noon.”
“No, what’s your conflict.”
“That’s the beauty of our story! Denzel sent some Ragheads to Guantanamo. They’re paroled because he violated their human rights, and they’re coming to town for payback. But the town is full of renegades, just like Reese, who are all about speaking Truth to Power and Sticking It To the Man. They’re on the side of the Ragheads because they were importing opium for the Narcos…”
“Who are all about speaking Truth to Power, exposing the inherent hypocrisies in the capitalist system, and Sticking It To the Man.”
“Exactly! So the Good Man is the Wrong Man.”
“Perfect! Sold!”

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